Rory’s Rich Kid School is holding a formal to save the spotted owl or horned owl or screech owl. As long as this dance isn’t raising funds for poor people, we’re ok!
Rory doesn’t want to go to the dance because she saw Sixteen Candles once and it scarred her for life. This is understandable. Lorelai talks her into it and tells Rory to bring Floppy Hair, who has been hanging out in their trees. So I guess Floppy is a spotted owl?
Lorelai is thrilled that it’ll finally start snowing in Stars Hollow. She loves snow! it’s magical and pretty and amazing!
Hey, look! I remembered I was reviewing this show!
It’s Thanksgiving(ish) in Stars Hollow and the whole town is excitedly decorating. Except Backwards Baseball Cap Diner Guy (Luke), because he’s a snarly curmudgeon who hates decorating and holidays and anything pointless that people do to fill their empty souls. He’s my favorite.
Happy birthday to Rory!
Happy birthday to Rory!
Happy 16th birthday (though weren’t you already 16 in the pilot episode?) dear Rory!
Guess we gotta milk your teenage years for as long as possible!
Yay! Let’s all eat some cake and unwrap a hip iBook laptop!
Sorry it’s taken me so long to get this one up. Lots of me falling asleep on the couch instead of doing work. In high school I wanted to start a church called “The Church of Sleep” because sleep is better than most all things (I’ll let you ponder on what those “other things” could be :winky face: :rolls eyes: :kills self:).
We start with another dinner cold open and some talk of dead people and Nazis, which, in 2015, is quite the overlapping Venn diagram. Uplifting!
One thought on this episode’s cold open – what kind of kid writes on legal pads in high school? Shouldn’t Rory be angling for a fancy Five Star notebook? Or a poor child to follow her around and take notes for her like all the rest of her rich buddies have?
We open this episode with Rory in English class with a Zach Braff knockoff teacher. If I’m not mistaken, Rory had English class back in episode two with an older professor who looked nothing like a guy who got lost in New Jersey once and thought he needed to write a coming of age story about it starring himself and Natalie Portman. I’m guessing original English teacher got fired because he, I don’t know, showed his dick to the lunch lady? And Lunch Lady was like, “That’s not organic!” and threw a frying pan at him. Her aim was true, he ended up in the hospital, and now Zach Braff works at Chilton.
In watching this show I have decided that every ridiculous over the top thing they show rich people doing is fact and not embellished at all for entertainment purposes. Rich people always have dinner by candlelight. Rich people are overbearing and pushy. Rich people are so consumed with whatever they think about all day (money?) that they cannot tell the difference between male and female staff. This is my Rich People Head Canon. So it is written, so shall it be done.
We open this episode on Boring Dinner with WASP family. Do you think that if Bruce Wayne sat down and watched this cold open he’d be happy his parents were dead because all Rich WASP people are boring as fuck? (HEAD CANON, remember? From like a paragraph ago?)
Side note – the title sequence of this show, in addition to being an Instagram filter before its time, would fit in quite well in Too Many Cooks.
Last Ditch Effort 
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