I’ve spent my entire weekend at the LA Podcast Festival. It was fun and I had a great time. However, I’m exhausted. I’d like nothing more than to put on a movie and mindlessly sew sequins onto a Harry Potter t-shirt for shits and giggles, but Gotham begins tomorrow. That means I must bring you Gilmore fun TODAY. That’s how dedicated I am to bringing unfunny observations about a 15-year-old TV show to you, the reader.
Based on the title alone, I’m already expecting this episode to be hostile. I’m sure it’s fine – it probably just means “the jerk.”
This cold open is all about shitty music, laundry, and coupons. It’s like being forced to have a conversation with your most boring aunt.
Palette cleanser – here’s a lion playing with a tire:
Just a quick note – starting the week of September 21st, I will be reviewing Season 2 of GOTHAM. Gilmore Girls reviews will still continue.
We begin this episode with Judgy WASP Mom and Spacey Grandpa complaining that someone in the neighborhood gave out king-sized candy bars for Halloween (aka THE BEST HOLIDAY EVER) thus outdoing the Gilmore’s regular-sized candy bars. Then people start talking about balls and I’m giggling like an 8-year-old because, as Lorelai says, “Balls are funny.” They are. They really really are.
Lorelai is gardening but that doesn’t matter – THERE ARE HALLOWEEN DECORATIONS IN THE BACKGROUND. YES!!! PRAISE!!! HALLOWEEN IS THE BEST HOLIDAY!!
Let us celebrate the dawn of fall both in real life & on the show by getting down to some “Monster Mash.”
We start this episode off with Rory bringing some laundry home to Stars Hollow. Apparently the show forgot that her grandparents gifted her a Prius at graduation, because she’s not driving one here. We know because it’s missing the distinctive “stinkbug ass” of all first-gen Priuses.
More importantly, Rory cut her hair! And it’s cute!
Wow. That’s a sign of how little can happen in these cold opens – I’m excited over a haircut and trying to be witty when referring to a Prius.
It’s “Shopping Week” at Yale which sounds like a completely made up thing that only exists on television. I Googled – It’s not! It’s REAL!!
Rory’s picked over 50 classes to try out, which sounds ridiculous because according to that link, you have to keep up with the reading/homework for any of the classes you shop. (Also – what about prerequisites? Do those just exist for us poors?)
How much would it cost for textbooks for 50 Ivy League classes? With Lorelai buying Rory all the hip trendy things out of the Young & Hip catalogue, and Rory’s 8 trillion textbooks, it’s like the girls are rolling in money like 1980s Wall Street bankers.
MONEY FIGHT!!!!
Last Ditch Effort 
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